My husband and I were preparing to go to our church and give some marriage counsel to a group of young couples. Having just written a post on communication, I was percolating with thoughts and tips, excited, nervous, and eager to share on one of my favorite subjects.
"I want to leave at 6:00," I informed my husband. "That gives us some extra time before every one else arrives."
"Okay, sounds great!" he said.
At 5:55, I was ready to go. The kids were in the van.
"Everyone, get ready to go!" my husband shouted.
"Everyone's ready!" I answered back.
But not everyone was. My husband was still at the computer, adding some final thoughts to our notes.
I glanced at my watch.
6:00.
"Time to go!" I calmly said, keys in hand.
"Okay!" my husband shouted back from the other room.
6:05.
"I'm leaving now!" I said, not so calmly anymore.
"Yes! Okay! Got it!" There was tension in his voice. Two minutes later, he came with his shoes on, papers in hand. We arrived with time to spare.
The talk went great. We had so much to say, I was worried that we would cover only half of our notes. As the ending time neared, I checked my watch.
7:55.
No problem, I thought, we'll finish a little after 8:00.
I also happened to notice my husband's watch right then.
7:50, it read.
Huh.
My husband wrapped up precisely at 8:00, but according to my watch, it was 8:05. All my impatience and irritation from earlier in the evening had been caused by a mere five-minute difference on our watches! Humbled, I made sure to synchronize our watches as soon as we got home to avoid this type of miscommunication in the future.
You know that I will be sharing this little story the next time I speak on marriage or communication! The lesson here is this: it is important for spouses to communicate and be on the same page as much as possible. If they aren't on the same page, they struggle and clash. But if they are, everything else falls into place with little conflict, and their marriage is a strong and solid fortress.
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