Organic Help

I thought, since I wrote about wanting to eat healthy and organic foods, that it would be good to share with you what I have learned. Compared to some, I only know a little, so I hope those who have input will share their knowledge with us!

For great organic fruits and vegetables, visit your local farmers' market. Oftentimes you can also buy bread, eggs, and local honey there.

If you cannot go to a farmer's market, most grocery stores have an organic produce section. Try to buy vegetables that are in-season and bought locally (versus out-of-season and shipped in from Mexico or South America).

Friends in California can try Farm Fresh to You. They are a family-owned farm in the Sacramento area (with a second farm in Southern California) and they will deliver to your home a variety of organic produce. My family has enjoyed their produce for the past six months. They are a great alternative for those who would love to go to the farmers' market,  but can't. They are also affordable. Boxes come in a variety of sizes, and can be delivered weekly or bi-weekly. Their website is www.farmfreshtoyou.com.

Another useful website is www.pickyourown.org. It lists farms in your neighborhood that are pick-your-own (it's aptly named.) It also has a calendar of the best times to pick your choice of produce. This is always a fun family adventure!

As for meat, a friend recently recommended grass-fed beef from Miller Ranch in Oakdale. You buy 1/4, 1/2, or a whole cow, and you get the best price for great beef! We didn't have the freezer space for 1/4 of a cow, so we split it with my mother-in-law. Their website is www.millerranchenterprises.com

I believe the best price for organic milk is at Costco, but someone correct me if I'm wrong. And I'm still unfamiliar with the best sources for free-range chickens and eggs.

And lastly, organic teas and coffees are now available at many stores (including Costco). I recommend buying organic teas and coffees because leaves and beans are greatly affected by chemicals used on them. If you can, look for the fair trade logo (or the words 'fair trade') on the label. This means that the tea and coffee was bought from a farm that pays its workers fair wages, as opposed to poverty-level wages, or in worst cases, salve workers. This also applies greatly to chocolate. Organic chocolate is safer (again, it's made from beans) and organic fair-trade chocolate is even better. Whole Foods is the only store I've found to carry both organic/fair-trade chocolate for eating and baking. Raley's/Nobhill and Trader Joe's do have milk and dark chocolate bars.

That is the extent of my knowledge, but I would like to learn more. If you know of a good source of organic food, please share it with us!

Back to the Grindstone

I've been looking into grinding my flour.

WHY?! you may ask. Is Rita trying to live out her childhood dream of being Laura Ingalls?

No. (And that is not why I braid my hair either.)

Nor am I jumping on the 'green-is-hip-save-the-earth' bandwagon.

The things is... grinding one's own flour is not a new thing. Neither is hanging one's clothes on a line to dry, or letting a cow roam and feed in a pasture (yes, innovative, isn't it?) My mother-in-law used to grind her own flour because it was cheaper. She made her own bread because store-bought bread was a luxury. Now, pre-cut white bread is cheap, and the fresh-straight-from-the-oven one is the luxury. And it used to be that white sugar and white flour (both bleached) were expensive, and now they are the common items on a store shelf. How is it that with modernization, we've gone backwards?

I am a mother who wants to give her children the best she can, and save money while doing so. I grew up half on home-cooked Chinese foods, and half on American fast foods and baked goods freshly made 'from the box.' I don't know if my parents knew better. Hong Kong is a great place to eat, but you could find almost anything conveniently packaged in plastic for the 'on-the-go' lifestyle of that metropolitan tropic.

But with the release of books and movies like 'SuperSize Me' and 'Food, Inc', I'm realizing that the way things were in my childhood was not necessarily the best. Somehow, our decision to make everything bigger, faster, and cheaper has turned Mother Nature on her head. Plants are genetically grown, animals spend their lives in cages, and even water is 'boosted' with added nutrients. This is all based on the assumption that God made a mediocre world and Man must improve upon it. I'm trying to approach it from the opposite angle: God made the world perfectly suited for us. Our bodies are designed perfectly to interact with the world, even on cellular levels.

So I hope to grind my own flour soon, and master the art of making a beautiful tall loaf of bread. If I could raise my own chickens again, I wouldn't even hesitate. I'd even be willing to try raising a goat for milk if I had to! I want to explore God's plan for nourishing our physical bodies, and rediscover the Garden of Eden that is right in front of our noses.

If you eat organically or make your own foods, I would like to know why you chose to do so. Please comment!

A Tale About a Worm

Worm was so excited! He was getting ready for a party! 

First, he put on his best shirt.
Then, he put on a nice tie.
All he needed now were his shoes.

He went to the front door, but found only one shoe by the door!

“Where is my other shoe?” Worm asked himself.

He looked in the closet. No shoe.
He looked in the laundry room. No shoe.
He looked by the back door. No shoe.

Finally, Worm’s brother came to ask him, “What is taking so long? We'll be late for the party!”

Worm told his brother, “I cannot find my other shoe!”

Worm’s brother said, “What do you need shoes for? You’re a worm!”

Worm stopped. Then he said, “Oh yeah.”

He forgot about the shoes and went to the party.

(There is no underlying moral to this story. This is a story I made up for my girls one night. Due to the seriousness of my recent posts, I wanted to post something light-hearted today.)

I am Shakable, He is Not

I recently received a message from Ben, friend and mentor. He wrote, "I read each of your blog entries and am inspired by your dream and your vulnerability."

I had to respond, because one of the things I've learned in recent years (from people like Ben) is that I must be humble and vulnerable with others if God is to work through me. How many people go through life thinking that they are alone in their problems? How many of us, Christians especially, have this subconscious belief that we have to look perfect to the world? And how much more will people be loved and cared for if we shared our burdens with each other?

A week ago, my friends William and Larisa and their children visited our home. They are a missionary family, traveling the world with their six children, witnessing mainly to Muslims in Jordan and Tunisia. It was a Sunday when they visited, and they were scheduled to depart on Tuesday for England. While we chatted, William had to take an urgent phone call. Larisa was  excited and awe-struck when she heard what the phone call was about: someone, a complete stranger, offered to house the entire family while they were in England!

This is nothing new for the Hernandez family; time and time again God had led them to the right people and the right place and provided everything they needed at the exact moment they needed it. Wherever they have traveled, they have never been without a bed, food, or friends. In my mind, they are great examples of how a Christian should live: in deep and complete trust of God. 

So I was a little surprised when Larisa shared something with me. She said, "It's Sunday afternoon, we're leaving on Tuesday, and we just got a place to stay. I admit that I was getting nervous."

Nervous?! Larisa?! When she had witnessed miracles equal to the parting of the Red Sea and the manna in the desert?!

She continued, "But every time, God has provided for us. He has never let us down. Sometimes it was at the last minute, but He always provided."

For me, that visit was a double blessing: good time with friends, and the reminder that we are all on this journey of faith. I can be vulnerable with you, because then we remember how, in contrast, our Foundation is unshakable... He never lets us down.

Tearing Down the Wall

The mother, surrounded by her four children, was about to exit the church.

Oh, maybe next week, I told myself. 

But no, no excuses this time. Because there might not be a next week.

My heart was pounding as I reached out to tap the mother's arm. At my touch, she turned, a look of wonder on her face.

"Hi, I've been meaning to introduce myself. I'm Rita."

And that was all I had to do to make a connection. So simple, but still so often a battle within me. I have never regretted it afterwards; the mom I met today was new to the area, is raising four children on her own, and is going to the Academy of Art University. Clearly, the loss would have been mine if I had not met her.

But what hinders me? What keeps my mouth from opening? I'm afraid of looking like a fool, I'm afraid of dead space in the conversation when I can't think of something to say, I'm afraid of being rejected... all excuses based in fear and pride, not in love and acceptance. With this fear, I create a wall between people and myself; sometimes it's a brick wall (I pretend to not see the person, or I feign busyness) or a glass wall (I make eye contact, or smile, but then turn my head). Over the years, the wall has grown so think and so tall, that it has kept me from showing love to people who clearly needed love.

There are those in the Body who are welcoming and gracious. I want to be one of those people. God, who is the source of love and courage, will mold me into the person I am meant to be.

Planning Not to Plan (Part 2 of 2)

Before I was married, I never had to think about birth control. It was a simple idea: don't have sex, don't get pregnant.

But as my wedding day approached, I knew I had some choices to make. My husband and I wanted children, but we thought it would be wise to wait a few years, after we've saved up money from my teaching job. I started looking into birth control.

The first thing I learned is that the term 'birth control' is a misnomer. Though many methods are more than 90% effective, there is still the chance that a woman will become pregnant. The idea that we can control when life begins is a false hope.

The second thing was that some of the most popular methods involve putting foreign substances or objects into your body, with possible harmful side affects. Some methods are even abortive. I knew right away that I didn't want any of that.

Then, at a party, my husband bumped into a college friend. The two started chatting about work, and she shared that she was working with a Christian pregnancy support organization, and that she and her husband had learned a natural method of birth control.

This was the first time I had even heard of such a thing. It had never seemed like an option, not with all the new products and modern methods out there. But the more I listened, and the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. God never makes mistakes, and He made women's bodies to function a certain way. His design was that a woman can become pregnant only during a short window every month. A husband and wife simply needed to avoid intercourse during that window.

I was very excited. Months before my wedding, I ordered a book and started learning about my body. The bodily signals were easy to learn, and I was soon an expert in my monthly rhythm. Besides being a preparation for my marriage, what I learned gave me a new respect for the body that God had created, because I finally understood what was going on inside me. I shared the information with my soon-to-be husband, and we discussed it together. We knew that this was in alignment with God's Word, making it the best choice for us. We also knew that this was a step of faith for us. By essentially 'planning not to plan', we were giving up 'control.'

There were some people who smirked when they heard about our choice in birth control. Those same people were able to say "I told you so" when I became pregnant four months after our wedding. Then when my son was five months old, I became pregnant again, though I was breast feeding. People started to joke about our rabbit-like characteristics, especially when I had another baby twenty-four months after my second. And every time, the question was, "Did you plan this?" I began to hate that question, because although the baby did not come in my timing, I knew it was all in God's plan, and He knew what was best. And I began to hate hearing people say a baby was an 'oops!', because no baby is a mistake, and no one should grow up thinking that he is an 'oops' and unwanted by his parents.

Looking back, I can see that there was a period of time when my husband and I felt emotionally alone, though we had supportive friends and family. We didn't feel financially or emotionally ready to become parents, all normal thoughts for first-time parents, but on top of that, we were nervous and afraid because we started doubting our choice. We lost sight of God's sovereignty and goodness. We wondered if we could care for these fragile new lives. And we desperately longed to shut out the voices that said, "You've made a mistake", clinging instead to the words of encouragement from the few people who understood what we were going through.

What helped us through that time was the Truth: all good gifts were from God, and that we needed to rely on Him, not on ourselves. We reminded ourselves that this IS what we had chosen, to step out in faith. So we had to take steps, albeit little steps at first. From this, early on in our marriage, my husband and I learned to trust God in all things. We lost our naive outlook on life, the underlying philosophy that everything can be planned out from graduation to retirement, and our comfortable "what-life-seems-to-be" bubble popped, not from dire circumstances, but on our own accord. And we started realizing, when we personally experienced the miracle of birth and witnessed the uniqueness of each child, that every child was indeed a blessing. When we met couples who could not have children, or have lost children, we were even more grateful for our healthy, beautiful children.

With time, our little steps grew bigger. Our biggest was when we decided to try to have a fourth child, even though my husband was unemployed at the time. We knew that if God gave us a fourth child, He would also provide all the means we needed to raise that child. I love telling that story now when we introduce our youngest member of the family.

Recently, we have met other like-minded couples, many who have had similar experiences. For so long, I thought I was one of few women to think this way. What a surprise then when, earlier this week, I had three conversations about this very topic! Though it saddens me to know that there is still an opinion out there among Christians that choosing natural birth control is uneducated, irresponsible, or old-fashioned, I am encouraged when friends remind me, "God will provide ALL that you need."

And that is our story, of how my husband and I learned to walk in faith together, step by step. With every step, our courage grows, and now we venture forth, like missionaries, into the suburban jungle. God opens our eyes to the lies around us, some so subtle or so ingrained that they are easily overlooked. Whenever we can, we teach our children that God has a purpose for each of them, that they were born at the perfect time. We encourage couples who are expecting to put their worries and fears into God's Hands. And this is always a good reminder for my husband and myself, since we still worry sometimes, and we still fight our fears, especially when we are feeling financially and physically stretched. But God is good, and God is sovereign. He may be writing the book for a fifth Baird child right now, but He'll let me know his or her name when the time comes.

If you are preparing yourself for marriage, learn about your options before going with what's 'popular'. There are people and tools out there to help a couple make a wise and Godly decision.

Addendum: I forgot to mention that I have fairly easy pregnancies and births. I have many friends who do not, and they have decided to limit the number of children they have. I know that if my pregnancies were difficult or life-threatening, my husband and I would have to reassess the situation and ask God for His wisdom to do what is best.

Shadow Life

Last Thursday, we received the news that Aunt Leanne, my mother-in-law's youngest sister, had died. They were sudden and unexpected words to hear, the end of a long and tragic story on earth. I find it strange when someone dies, because it only seems like the person has gone away on a long vacation. Maybe that's the echo of our eternal spirit. And I do believe that Aunt Leanne's story is not over.

I loved Aunt Leanne. She was a very colorful and energetic person, a lover of music, art, and nature. She never stopped. I remember the day she came home from hiking and camping in Yosemite, and within a half-hour, was in downtown Chico, attending the local jazz festival. But though she loved singing Christmas carols and all things beautiful and joyful, she never wanted to know Jesus. Though she loved creation, she lived only a shadow life because she never knew the Creator.

I will not be writing for a few days, due to travel and time with family. If you remember, please pray for Leanne's three children, her ex-husband, her parents, and her siblings.

Jonah Goes to Nineveh (Part 1 of 2)

I didn't write yesterday because I had to take a break from all this intense writing.

That, and I was playing Jonah.

When I first started this blog, I already had in mind several topics about which I could write. I was going to leave the subject of birth control for later... much later. But then (funny how it is), in the past three days, I've had three different conversations about the very topic. Believe me, this is not normal-everyday small talk for me. Before now, I've had maybe three conversations about birth control (with people other than my husband) in the past ten years. It is something I ponder on quite frequently, but not something I feel comfortable discussing.

So, I was playing Jonah. I was running away from Nineveh, going in the other direction, trying to avoid the voice of God. But you know how the story goes. Without a storm or a fish, I realized that my next blog entry was to be about my choice in birth control, as controversial as it may be. Today, I will give you a quick summary, and tomorrow, a more detailed account.

Remember, I am not an expert, or a doctor, or a theologian. I am expressing to you my experiences and how I've come to my decision based on what I know Biblically. I do appreciate your comments, if you would like to share them with me and my readers.

I have never taken 'the pill'. I never felt comfortable with the idea of putting hormones in my body. Nor did I feel comfortable with putting a foreign object into my body. The more I thought about it, the more I believed that God had designed a woman's body to be in perfect working order, that the rhythms in my body were not without a purpose. My husband and I discussed this thoroughly before we were married, and he agreed with me completely.

There is nothing earth-shattering about my discovery, but the comments we've received over the years have been unexpected. If they were all from non-Christians, they would have washed over me without a scratch. But I have found that even some of my own Christian brothers and sisters viewed our decision as unwise, naive, or irresponsible, like we were drunken teenagers at a party.

It comes down to a matter of trust. I give up the control (that I think I have) and trust God. I live knowing that He will not give me more than I can bear. I live knowing that every child is born at the perfect time, for a perfect purpose, to the perfect family.

I Have a Dream

I know it's not Martin Luther King Jr. Day, but last night, I was inspired.

The Valentine's Day dinner went beautifully. Hearing the laughter and playful banter around the tables as couples shared their stories warmed my heart. But what really lifted my spirit was seeing teenagers sacrificing four hours to interact with our children, and seeing older married couples attend our event. I listened as Julie and Earle, married for more than fifty years, described the day they met like it was yesterday. Martha and Jim's romance stemmed from friendship nearly thirty years ago, the fruits of which are obvious to this day. I have yet to be married for one decade, but I pray that my marriage will be that strong and that fresh when I am celebrating my thirtieth, fortieth, or fiftieth anniversary.

But I digress a little.

I have a dream.

I have a dream that one day we will build playgrounds next to senior centers, and that we will see seniors reading animatedly to children during story hour at the library.

I have a dream that young people will mow lawns for the elderly and carry their groceries, even when they are not financially compensated for their action, that 'retirement' means volunteering at the local youth center, and 'hanging out at the mall' means taking an elderly neighbor shopping.

I have a dream that teenagers will no longer feel awkward around adults, and that single people will not feel a world apart from married folks with children.

I have a dream that every baby will be held, hugged, kissed, and cherished by someone who sees the value of a child.

I have a dream.

I have a dream that when one enters a church, one will never feel the invisible walls of age differences, unknown standards, or established social networks.

I have a dream that every child will grow up with the wisdom of a grandparent to guide him, even if the grandparent is not his own, that every adult will have someone following in his footsteps, even if the someone is not his kin, that nobody, child or adult, will ever feel worthless and unloved.

I have a dream that all generations will sit around a dinner table and feast together, not only at Christmas or Easter, but everyday, and not only with blood relatives, but with everyone.

I have a dream that life on earth will look more like life on heaven.

I have a dream.

Appreciation and Apologies

First and foremost, thank you to those who already feel that my blog is worth following! It encourages me to go on.

Secondly, I want to say that I am NOT an expert on anything, and I am not here to condemn anyone, or to push my lifestyle on anyone. I get fired up sometimes, but only on matters that I believe with all my heart. I can't build my life on wishy-washy principles. But then there are the gray areas. I understand that I am making choices for me and my family, as you may be for you and yours, and though we both base our choices on what we learn from the Bible and from those who speak wisdom, there will always be those gray areas. We are all striving to be good stewards of our 'talents', and your 'investments' will look different from mine, simply based on location, income, health, and personality. 

So, that said:

- I try to feed my kids home-made foods and organic fruits and vegetables, but I do resort to pre-packed snacks on occasion. We buy bread, though I am trying to make my own, but... well... let's just say I'm still learning. We eat fast food (In-and-Out) once in a blue moon, and will eat store-bought pizza when it is served at kid's birthday parties. We can't afford organic eggs or milk, but have recently bought grass-fed beef at a great price. (thanks Flo!)

- I mainly buy clothes at thrift stores and consignment shops. I like supporting small local businesses, but I also admit that I like the convenience of Target, and that I have in the past bought something at Walmart because it was a really good deal.

- I use cloth diapers, and have used cloth diapers for all four kids, but I always have a pack of disposable ones on hand (for traveling, babysitters, days when I'm just too tired to fight a squirming baby with a pin in my hand). I also hang my laundry on most days, but will gladly use the dryer on overcast or rainy days.

- We walk to the park and library near our home, but we drive everywhere else.

- We live in a normal-looking home (in fact, it's a rental), not in a commune in the middle of the desert. Sometimes, I daydream about buying a small neighborhood, calling it Bairdville, and having all my closest friends live there with me. But I know that that, above all, is not God's intention for my life. How can I be His hands and feet if I tie those hands and feet with ropes of rules and regulations? 

Which brings us back to the gray areas. I know that women generations before me raised four kids without the help of modern-day conveniences, and I think that if I had to, I could do it too. But I am where I am, and I can only do so much at this point. And I'm still learning. Compared to where I was eight years ago, I've come a long way!

My advice, to you and to myself: don't compare. Don't compare yourself to me. Don't compare yourself to the mother of twenty-some children on TV. Don't compare yourself to your great-grandmother Lily who was a widow at the age of twenty-eight, single mother of six, working a farm by day and sewing beautiful ladies' dresses by night. Learn to live YOUR life as God intends for YOU! And remember, that though we may have high ideals, we are works in progress. Frame and hang your ideals as goals to strive towards, not laws to mark failure.

A Celebration of Marriage (or Marriage is a Celebration)

It is Valentine's Day today. My husband and I never celebrate Valentine's Day, for two reasons:

1) It is overshadowed by his birthday on the following day.

2) We believe that one should show love everyday, in every way.

[Tangent: My husband numbers and lists things, even in speech. I picked this habit up from him. Cute, isn't it?]

But today, on this Valentine's Day, my husband and I are helping our church host a Valentine's Day dinner (with free babysitting). Are we contradicting ourselves? I think not.

Because tonight, we will be celebrating marriage, which is something that our culture does not uphold greatly anymore. Romantic love is idolized and flaunted, but marriage is seen as old-fashioned and unnecessary. If people could only see what a beautiful godly marriage looks like! Stop watching the movies where kids are hooking up and adults are having affairs! Stop watching the TV shows full of stereotypical weak husbands and nagging wives. Observe my friends Ben and Judy, who are now experiencing Alzheimer's together. They patiently serve each other and joyfully play together, even in the midst of a dark fog of uncertainty. This is the definition of love. This is the trust and persistence that God intends for marriage. And, this is what people long for, unconditional love that does not fade away when the sun comes up.

As author and comedian Gene Perret once said, "Our wedding was many years ago. The celebration continues to this day." My husband and I will be celebrating tonight by encouraging couples to laugh together, to remember the days of courtship and anticipation, and to always live in the light of knowing that they really did marry the best person.

And I also want to say that, tonight, the free babysitting will be provided by the youth in our church. Any event that brings multiple generations together, serving each other, gets a gold star from me!

Day 1

I put off blogging for a long time. 

A looooooooong time. 

Why?

1) Because everyone said I should, which of course, means my stubbornness kicks in and I say no.

2) Because I never follow a trend just for the sake of following it. And if I do see an actual benefit to something trendy, I usual wait until the trend is over so that I don't appear as if I'm doing something for the sake of being trendy. See #1 above.

3) Because I don't do anything half-way. All or nothing. That's me. So if I start something, I don't like quitting.
4) Because at the time I had four kids, which means that I hardly have time to sit and write, and also, it means I feel that I have very little to write about. I don't think people want to read about how I spent my day cooking, washing, teaching, and reading to the kiddos.

Then you're probably wondering...what made you change your mind?

I realized that I do have something to write about, or at least, attempt to write about. I am a follower of Christ, a wife, and a mother, navigating my dinghy through the treacherous ocean of this world. I am trying to raise my children to know God, and I am trying to love my husband like Christ loves me. And since you've already caught a glimpse of my personality (reread #1-#4 above if needed), you know I'm not going to do anything conventionally unless it's absolutely worth doing.

So I decided I'm going to write about my life as I am learning to truly live, while juggling children, marriage, work, and the American suburban culture knocking at my front door. Other quick notes about me, just to break the ice:

1) We don't watch TV, cable, or satellite anything. We do have a television set now, after 8 years without one, but only because a friend gave it to us. It's not a flat screen or hi-def anything. We use it for DVDs.

2) My husband is a pastor (since 2012), we live in the San Francisco Bay Area, and we are mainly a one-income family, which means we are ON A BUDGET. I bring in a little extra cash by teaching piano and attempting to publish my writing.

3) We are trying to eat organically, and I do make many foods from scratch. More on that later.

4) We have seven children (since August 2016), and we are a homeschooling family. More on that later too.

Some topics will be light-hearted and encouraging, others may spark controversy. Either way, I want to hear your thoughts. Just be kind; I'm tough on the outside but soft on the inside.