New Year, New Fruit

As I thought about this blog post, I realized that every January, I write something that starts with, "I don't really believe in New Year's resolutions, but..."

And it's true. I don't believe in New Year's resolutions, only because I don't believe that there is anything more magical about making a life change on January 1st than making a change on any other day of the year.

But there is something about the "tick tock" of 11:59, December 31st becoming the "tick tock" of 12:00, January 1st that makes a person think. We all hope that life will be better in the New Year–not worse, not the same, but better. The change in number marks the passage of time, and it should mark a change in us. As Ecclesiastes 3:1 (ESV) says, "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven." The New Year is a new season. It's a new page, both literally and figuratively.

So, I was thinking about my 2021. What do I want it look like? In 2020, I have had more friends lose loved ones. My friend Sarah passed away on December 28th. She was a person I looked up to; despite enduring physical pain for most of her life, she was a beautiful, joyful soul, an amazing singer, and the best mother to her two little ones and best wife to her husband. I've also had many blessings in 2020–wonderful memories with my family, personal creative growth, and spiritual growth too. So how do I continue in this growth? In light of Sarah's passing, how do I best use the time I have left in my life? 

This is what came to mind:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance [patience], kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23 ESV)

In the past, I've prayed for more love, more joy, more patience (especially patience!) and whenever I acted unlovingly or grumpily or impatiently, I just prayed for more love, more joy, more patience! I thought that was what I needed. And really, eight of the nine things listed as the fruit of the Spirit are all things I want more of, all except... self-control.

I don't know how you feel about self-control, but it always felt a little out-of-place to me on this list. It just sounds more... blah. In a Bible passage that gives me warm fuzzies when I read it, self-control seems like something Paul just tacked on. "Oh yeah, and self-control. I'll just put it here with these other things." Love and joy and everything else make me feel more free, and self-control sounds so restrictive.

But this time, as I meditated on Galatians 3:22-23, I had this thought.

When I think of the times I've acted unlovingly or grumpily or impatiently, my regret afterwards was usually, "I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have said that." All the times I've yelled at the kids, it wasn't more patience I needed, but more self-control! There is a reason Paul put self-control on the list!

I told my husband about this revelation. He got so excited about it! Why do we think of self-control in terms of how much dessert we eat on Christmas Eve or how much we drink on New Year's Eve? God practices self-control... all the time! If He didn't, all His power would be unleashed on us! And Jesus, He is described as a man of meekness. What is meekness? Strength under control. Jesus is also self-controlled!

And so I'll be making 2021 the Year of Self-Control. If I can control myself better, then I will also have more fruit of the Spirit! That thought actually gives me warm fuzzies!

How about you? Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Which would you like to focus on this year?