Family for the Holidays

I had to stop to enjoy the moment.

Around my table were three generations and two cultures. For the first time, energetic Cantonese conversation mixed with cheerful English banter, filling the room with a joyful noise that I thought would never be possible.

I had assumed that my uncle and aunt would prefer Chinese food over ham and sweet potatoes. I had worried that dinner would be quiet and somber, like the dinners I remembered from my childhood. And I had thought that we would be uncomfortable with each other, feeling a void in years, languages, and beliefs.

But I was wrong. And I'm so glad I was wrong.

And I'm glad that God's Spirit prompted me to invite my family (the few who lived nearby) to my home for Thanksgiving. I was reaching out to the uncle I knew from my toddler years, but then didn't see for twenty years after moving to the United States. Then the last ten years, when my uncle lived just in the next town over, I still thought it someone else's (namely, my parents') responsibility to reach out to him. After all, I barely knew him. There was nothing that tied him to me except for our blood relation. He never did anything to reach to me, so what did I owe him?

Then we found out earlier this year that my uncle had cancer– not just one, but two forms of cancer. Something in me told me that I had waited too long. It was time to love him. God created families with a purpose, even if it is a purpose which I don't fully comprehend.

As soon as I was ready, I prayed for guidance in how to reconnect with my uncle and his family. Visiting them, buying them a gift... all those things didn't seem like the right thing to do. Then God told me, and though I had my doubts, I obeyed. And I was blessed with a wonderful Thanksgiving memory!

The holiday season is a time for celebrating family, but for many, that is not as easy as it sounds. You may have a parent, child, or sibling with whom you are not on speaking terms, or you may have family members who would rather bring up your differences every moment possible. Maybe it's the lack of family, or the death of a loved one. Ask God how you can find or give healing this year, and prepared to be pleasantly surprised.