What I've Learned during Covid

Recently, I learned something about myself.

I walked into the kitchen and saw a mountain of pots and pans in the sink, leftover from breakfast and lunchtime. 

Ugh, I said to myself. I knew I had to tackle them before dinner prep started. 

I took a step toward the sink, my eyes locked on the dishes, daring them to look away...  and I lost the staring contest.  I turned and decided I'd rather bake something instead (even if that meant more dishes.) 

Then, while the pumpkin pasties were in the oven, awaiting my consumption, I started washing and cleaning up. Funny, how at that point, I didn't mind doing the dishes.

What did I learn?

That it's not the kitchen that I like, but the food. I'm not really in the kitchen unless there is en enticing, tasty reason to be.

Here is something else I've learned from these recent months: what is essential, and what is merely an inconvenience.

Wearing a mask is an inconvenience, when people are losing their jobs and losing their loved ones.

Writing a card and putting it in the mail, or baking banana bread and dropping it off at someone's house, is an inconvenience, when there are people who are lonely and missing friends and family.

Packing up enough fold-up chairs for a family of 10, along with toys, crayons, and lunches for the little ones as we attend the 11:00 outdoor service is an inconvenience, when it means that we can gather with our church family for worship.

Do you see what I mean?

Even today, when the sun was shining too brightly and the black top started warming up to uncomfortable temperatures, I thought to myself, "This is merely an inconvenience! What is better than being with my church family on Palm Sunday?!"

And I pray that you learn this lesson too. There are so many non-essential details in life that we can complain about, but if we really focus on what is important, we will find that those details don't really matter anymore.

What have you learned during this Covid time?

Announcing My New Book!

When California went into Covid Lock-Down, almost exactly one year ago now, I felt like life came to a halt. We cancelled our St. Patrick's Day dinner with my in-laws. We moved church services to "on-line." We stopped getting together with our friends.

But, though life slowed down considerably, life didn't stop altogether, especially in my busy household. We found ways to keep ourselves busy, and I actually enjoyed having more time with my children.

This past year has been a gift to me, and a side product of my extra time with my family is my new book, "Dirtying My Sleeves." The book was in its infancy stage at the start of 2020; I figured it would take me several years to finish it. Then, when I suddenly found myself with extra time at home, I discovered that it was just what I needed to think, ponder, observe, research, and  finish writing this book.

So I am excited to announce that this book is now available! It is part life story, part parenting tips...here is an excerpt from the first chapter.

...what I realized one day, as I watched my daughter wear her pancakes and syrup, is that parenting is all about "dirtying my sleeves." There are things I must do as a parent, no matter how much I may dislike doing them! I can't parent from a distance, with a pair of chopsticks to help extend my reach. I can't wear rubber gloves and be picky and choosy, being involved only when I want and stepping back when I'd rather be doing something else. Parenting involves the whole person jumping in, being in the middle of it all, and letting the pancakes and syrup get on me too. I grasped this when I had my first baby–there was no weekend or vacation from this job. But it was not until I had my eighth baby that I learned to embrace it. This really is going to take all of me...

...This book is not a "how-to" manual, nor is it a solution to your parenting woes. It is simply a retelling of my experience and what I have learned over the past sixteen years. You will see that I started out the same as any other new mom: fearful, uncertain, anxious, grumpy, impatient. I was trying so hard to hold onto my life B.C. ("Before Children") that I was closed to new possibilities. But with help from God and the community around me, I have grown, emerged, and flourished, and continue to do so. Through motherhood, with all its highs and lows, I have found a joy that is unmatched, and a sense of accomplishment that is eternal.

If you would like to purchase a copy, you can do so on Amazon.com.

The Big "What-Ifs"

In the past two years...

a friend lost a husband,

a friend lost a wife,

a friend lost a child,

a friend lost a parent to cancer,

and a friend was diagnosed with breast cancer.

This is basically my list of the Big "What-Ifs". 

Other what-ifs aren't so scary. My husband could lose his job–no biggie, been there, done that. Our house could burn down; that's just stuff, stuff comes and stuff goes.

But to lose my husband, my child, my parent, or my health... I have to ask myself, "Would I start doubting God's love and faithfulness? Would I turn from him? or doubt his existence? How would I respond?" And these things could happen to me. Four of these five friends are my age. 

Seeing my friends go through these heart-breaking, soul-crushing times have been the most difficult thing I've ever experienced. The only thing harder would be experiencing them myself. 

But–if this is any comfort to people going through a hardship right now–it's because of my friends that I'm no longer afraid of the Big "What-Ifs." 

Because I've seen my friends go through these times, and come out the other side.

Because I've seen how their faith carried them along when they had no strength left.

Because I've seen our church family surround my friends with love and care.

And because I've seen the Savior cover them in His wings and draw them near, even when He felt the most distant and silent.

There are some changes coming in the next few months for my family, and thinking about the unknown always causes a ball of anxiety to collect in the pit of my stomach. 

But I don't have to be afraid. God is the faithful Shepherd, and through green pastures or the Valley of the Shadow of Death, He is always with me.