The Fruits of our Labor

Or should I say... the vegetables of our labor!

Our first attempt at gardening is producing exciting and delicious-looking results! I love hearing the children's cries of "Look how tall the corn is!" and "We have a baby squash!" My children have never been excited about squash before.

And we have learned so much. The children take care of the daily chore of watering the plants (never with complaint). I'm loving my role as Mother Nurturer, making sure each and every plant is healthy with plenty of sun, water, food, and room to grow. Gardening is not as daunting as it used to be!

See the baby corn?

The zucchini squash did well growing in the old sandbox.

The snow peas are so lovely and delicate. 
I like the way their vines wrap around everything.

Louder than the Trees

It has been quite a week, with no vacation from the vacation. The house looks like a disaster after unpacking from family camp and moving furniture for band practice. We spent Monday at the orthodontist (the bill was 'yikes!') and dealing with the police and the recovery of our housemates' stolen car. And today was a trip to Filoli with my sister as her belated birthday present. There is no end to it all.

But, while at Filoli, I did have a moment to sit on a park bench and scribble down these thoughts. As the olive trees whispered around me, and the birds twittered in anticipation of the day, I remembered something.

Last Thursday, we had arrived at family camp, and I was so caught up in keeping-the-baby-from-eating-dirt and getting-the-two-year-old-to-cooperate (besides feeding, dressing, and resting everyone else) that it wasn't until Sunday that I realized I had forgotten to worship. I was surrounded by God's majesty, but I didn't see it. Only when I heard these words sung, All that I want to do is sing to You, louder than the trees..., did I realize my wrong.

The words are from one of my favorite worship songs, written by talented local musician Justin Dillon Stevens. The bridge of the song says, And all the earth sings and am I the least of these. And I did feel like the 'least of these'. The mountains reached to catch the clouds racing overhead. The pine trees towered above me like skyscrapers. The winds, though gentle, were still strong enough to cause the trees to sway. I was but a speck in the vast forest. But nevertheless, I closed my eyes, lifted my head, and sang at the top of my lungs, to be louder than the trees. And I remembered, that even in the midst of busyness, or especially in the midst of busyness, I need to stop and worship the One who is greater than all things.

God is Goodness

A young lady, seven-and-a-half months pregnant, was on her way to a baby shower when another car ran a red light and crashed into hers. She was rushed to the hospital, where doctors did an emergency C-section to try to save the baby. They were too late.

A couple found out in an ultrasound that their little girl was developing without kidneys. They chose to love her as she was and cherish her for the few hours they had with her. Surrounded by friends and family, the couple welcomed Olivia into the world, and bid farewell to her on the same day.

A mom heard her five-year-old complaining about not feeling well. The next day, they were at the hospital. The five-year-old never went home.

All true stories, and there are a million more out there. My heart cries when I hear stories like these. I hold my own children, and wonder what I would do if I was that young lady, or that couple, or that mom. Would I be angry at God? Would I reject him? Would I run and hide?

Other people ask questions like, "Why do these things happen?" and I say "I don't know." They ask, "How can God be good if He allows things like this to happen?" and I say, "I can't really explain that either."

But I know that God is goodness. He is all things good. And to push Him away in the midst of hurt and suffering is to push away the very goodness we need to heal.

My Growth Chart

This week, we leave for family camp with our church. It's the third year now for our family, and has become a tradition for the weekend after Father's Day.

As I pack sleeping bags and clothes, I remark how life has changed in the past three years. Family camp is like a measuring stick, marking the growth in my life.

Three years ago, we were new at Valley Bible Church. Friends invited us to join them at the camp, but my husband was unemployed, and even a hundred dollars was too much for us to spend on a family vacation. We had just decided to move in with my in-laws, and my heart was battling my deep emotions of being pregnant and leaving what I considered my 'home'. Trusting God was a daily lesson.

Two years ago, my husband was finishing a year of teaching at his new job, we had a healthy ten-month-old baby boy, and we were itching to move out of my in-laws' house. I had spent a year of learning how to live with different personalities, how to love and forgive, and I was tired. The next step was to find a rental that was affordable yet accommodating for our growing family, and I had to leave for camp with an application pending. It took all my will to keep my mind off of the phone call I wanted to get when I got home. I had to let it go, along with my anxiety. It was our first year at the camp, and I had a great time! (I wrote out the complete story last year, if you'd like to read it: Home is where...)

One year ago, we were enjoying our new home, and I was just settling in when I found out I was pregnant. I thought I had learned all about trusting God, but this news revealed to me that I had not yet learned to rely completely on God. Through much prayer, I was able to be in a place of peace by the time family camp rolled around. (Here also is the complete story from that time: Trust in the Author)

And this year, I've completed another year of homeschooling, the first time with five children total. It was a year of learning patience (again) and trust in God (again) as we hit a few financial speed bumps. Even though sometimes I feel like I'm learning the same lessons again and again, I do see the growth in me. I'm quicker to rely on God now, and quicker to let things go. And that's a good thing, since I don't know what tomorrow brings, besides leaving for family camp!

A Summer of Healthy, DIY Cooking

I like to borrow cookbooks from the library, especially ones that show you how to do-it-yourself instead of buying the prepackaged version. These cookbooks usually start with an introduction that say something like this:

When I was young, I would look longingly at my friends as they ate their Wonderbread sandwiches and drank Kool-aid. They went home to cookies from a box, while I had snacks of homemade seaweed chips or zucchini brownies. Now that I'm older, I thank my mom for filling me with what she thought was best.

Maybe someday my kids will write something like that.

In the past five days, I've made a gluten-free quinoa chocolate cake, quinoa strawberry-banana muffins, vegan apple bread, a polenta pie, a vegan noodle casserole, and spinach-strawberry-banana-orange smoothies. Don't worry, we've also had steak, chicken, frozen yogurt, popsicles, and other more normal sounding foods.

But I'm sure my kids are really missing their boxed macaroni-and-cheese right now. And I haven't totally given up on that yet.

That's because, after reading several books, talking to several people, and observing others, I've decided not to conform to any particular diet. Not the low-carb diet, not the high protein diet, not the veggies-only diet. I've decided not to make food my idol. When the 'experts' all claim something different, I think moderation and good-ol'-fashion- homecookin' is the best answer. Besides, by limiting what my family eats, it also limits our interactions with other people. I'm accommodating to people when they come over for dinner, but I can't expect everyone to do that for us. And what I have seen are moms tensing up at other people's houses because they don't know "what's in the food," or isolating themselves from gatherings (eating out is almost impossible on a strict diet) because they can't eat what other people eat.

And I don't want that.

But I still want to cook healthier this summer by cutting back on meals centered around meat and diary (my husband has high blood pressure, and his doctor's solution is to put him on medication for the rest of his life) and learning how to make yummy, healthy snack foods for the kids (like DIY cheese crackers! check out this link: cheese-crackers-recipe).

So let me share with you a recipe that my friend Amanda gave me. She is a mom, a vegetarian, and one of the best DIY at-home cooks I know! She likes to double this recipe and put the extras in the freezer for a quick grab-and-go snack for her husband or daughter. Last week, I made a single batch, fed half to the kids, and now have the other half reserved for a busy day.

Enjoy! And I hope to share more recipes as I play around!

NUTRIGRAIN BARS

1 cup butter (room temperature)

1 cup brown sugar

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 cup all-purpose flour

1 1/2 cups oats

1 teaspoon almond or vanilla extract

strawberry preserves (or any other type of fruit jam)

Cream sugar and butter together. Mix in flours, oats and extract. Press half of mixture into a greased 9x13 dish. Spread fruit filling onto the mixture, then spread the rest of the mixture on top (you can crumble it too).

Bake at 350 degrees F for 20-25 minutes.

The Last Word on Modesty (at least for now)

Two Sundays ago, one of our pastors (his name is Jason) preached on a somewhat controversial passage of the Bible, I Timothy 2:8-15. While I am not here to argue with anyone about "does women have authority in church to lead and preach?", I do want to address verse 9-10, which is:

I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God. (NIV)

There, in my own church, was a lesson on modesty! Although it is important to dress appropriately for church (standards which can vary nowadays, depending on the church), church should not be a fashion parade. I've seen women (usually younger ones) come to church in clothes that were clearly meant to attract attention. I myself have fallen into that trap, of using church as a place to show off a new outfit. "I have nowhere else to wear this," I tell myself. But what I wanted were the compliments.

The verse above was a good reminder (and conviction) to focus on beautifying my heart, and not myself, when I get ready on Sunday mornings. That may mean being patient with my children, being kind and understanding to my husband, and being thankful to my Lord.

Also, I've finished reading A Return to Modesty, by Wendy Shalit. This book was not what I had expected: I wanted tips on how a woman should dress, but instead, I learned about how our culture's leniency in dress and sex has affected other areas of life, including the male/female relationship. This book is about getting back to the basic idea that God designed male and female to be different, to complement each other, and to respect each other. It is about not believing the pervasive lies that are so common now, such as "Living together is how you practice being married" or "Men are just big boys." 

Despite how media portrays girls, most girls do not feel comfortable in revealing clothes (but may follow a trend for the trend's sake) or sleeping around (but do it because they think they're "suppose" to be doing it). Cohabiting is now seen as a normal step in a dating relationship, just like somehow a kiss on a first date had become normal. But girls just want someone to care for them. They want to feel protected. All they are looking for is deep, abiding love, and so they compromise a part of themselves in their search for that love.

Speaking practically, sons and daughters should both be taught about modesty, in dress and in relationships with the other gender. Boys shouldn't have their pants hanging down below their underwear, or wear swim pants that barely hang on their hips. Going shirtless is appropriate only in some cases. They should learn to open doors and carry bags for females, and give up their seats when a woman is present. Parents of boys should stress that they are protectors of women and leaders of the home. They are the knights in the stories.

Girls should be careful of how much skin they show, and learn to choose clothes that are functional and attractive without being revealing. As Jason (the pastor who preached on I Timothy) said when he shared about being a father, "I want my daughter to know how to handle her beauty." And, they should be taught to allow boys to be gentlemen. Not that they cannot be strong and skilled and leaders too, but they need to respect the men in their lives.

Today, writing about modesty is much easier than practicing it. What used to be common thinking is now not so common. But if we as parents focus on the small flock we have in our keep, we can find the balance that God had intended when He created us, male and female.

A Taste of Grace

Whew! It's been a busy week!

We are down to the final week of school, and for our family, that means it's the week of the big performance! On the last day of school (which is tomorrow), the children will sing, dance, recite, and play the piano for their grandparents, aunts, and several friends. This year, they will also be presenting individual science reports that they researched and wrote. All of this happens in our living room, which means I'm cleaning and decorating the walls with their art work and posters. It's very exciting, but oh, a lot of work!

So, I haven't had time to write more on modesty. I've been itching to write more on that subject since finishing A Return to Modesty, but that will have to wait another day or two, because today, besides getting ready for the performance, I am helping a friend out by watching her four children. And as I listen to her children and my children, ages eight months to nine years, bounce between joyful play and selfish fighting, a thought passes through my mind.

How do you teach children to be gracious?

I know children go through a phase where they become very legalistic. They have a hard time seeing past rules, fairness, and justice. But that doesn't stop me from trying to teach them to understand why a two-year-old doesn't share, or why we should be forgiving when a person runs into us on a bike. I think some people are born gracious, but most of us have to learn it. And the only way to learn to give grace, is to receive grace. You don't know what it is until you've had a taste of it.

I want to be a more gracious mom. Not a push-over mom, but less nagging and more understanding. I want to be the one who gives my children their first taste of grace, and I pray that by doing so, I will raise gracious children.

Thinking More About What I Eat

I almost picked up a bag of those strange, crunchy, snap pea things at Costco yesterday. Then I thought, "Are we just replacing unhealthy processed foods with healthier-looking processed foods?"

We like convenience. And if the packaging claims 'organic', 'less fat', or 'minimally processed', we feel better about putting that food into our bodies. But can't I just give my kids an actual snap pea to eat, or carrot sticks, or an apple?

My goal this summer is to expand my cooking repertoire and make a habit of making more strawberry-spinach smoothies and kale chips and reaching less for a bag of packaged crackers or granola bars. My family will venture into more vegetarian and vegan cooking (after watching only the last twenty minutes of the whole-foods, plant-based diet documentary "Fork Over Knives", my meat-loving husband actually said, "Maybe we should give it a try.") I'm not making drastic changes in our diet (to be on the safe side, for my children's sake), but I am thinking more about how God designed our bodies, and I am willing to explore how our diet plays into that.

There will be more to come! I'm excited about sharing recipes and writing about what I learn!