It is the day I have been waiting for. My daughter turns eleven in two days. I can hardly believe that the past eleven years have flown by so quickly, and now, it is time.
I ask my daughter what she would like to get for a tasty treat.
"Ice cream," she answers.
Easy. Off to Coldstone we go. We savor each bite as we chat about sour gummy candies freezing in ice cream and why 7-11 is called 7-11.
Then, off to the next location. I drive around and look for a secluded, park-like setting. Finding one near the local feed and grain store, we park and walk to the benches under the hanging vines. I hand my daughter her birthday present. Then I begin.
It isn't difficult at all. Since my husband and I have already brought up the subject of puberty with our two oldest children, all I need to do is remind my daughter of our previous conversations. Then I add the part I have been rehearsing in my head for years, the part about menstruation and bras and how these things will affect her life.
"Do you have any questions?" I ask her at the end.
She smiles a little and shakes her head no as she returns her new book and underwear to the gift bag.
"Thank you," she says quietly.
Her reserved response catches me off guard at first. It is not often that I see my loud, enthusiastic, "cheerleader" girl so subdued. But I see the pensive, yet relieved, look on her face and I understand her completely. I was feeling the burden of parenting while she was feeling the burden of growing up, but in sharing this with her, we are now carrying the burdens together. My daughter will not face the mysteries of growing up by herself, and I will not wonder and worry about her as she meets these new challenges. I have her trust, and we have communication. That was my goal, and the best birthday present I knew that I could give her.
Her reserved response catches me off guard at first. It is not often that I see my loud, enthusiastic, "cheerleader" girl so subdued. But I see the pensive, yet relieved, look on her face and I understand her completely. I was feeling the burden of parenting while she was feeling the burden of growing up, but in sharing this with her, we are now carrying the burdens together. My daughter will not face the mysteries of growing up by herself, and I will not wonder and worry about her as she meets these new challenges. I have her trust, and we have communication. That was my goal, and the best birthday present I knew that I could give her.
Before we head for home, I hug my daughter and tell her that I love her. I also commend her for growing into an extraordinary young lady. She blushes, still the sweet little girl who is not used to hearing such words.
Oh, how quickly eleven years have come and gone!
(For those of you who are wondering, the book I gave my daughter was The Care and Keeping of You: The Body Book for Younger Girls by Valerie Schaefer. It is published by American Girl, not a Christian publisher, but it covers the basic important changes in a young girl's body in a direct and gentle way. Find it used on abebooks.com (no shipping costs!) by clicking here or on amazon.com by clicking here.)
Oh, how quickly eleven years have come and gone!
(For those of you who are wondering, the book I gave my daughter was The Care and Keeping of You: The Body Book for Younger Girls by Valerie Schaefer. It is published by American Girl, not a Christian publisher, but it covers the basic important changes in a young girl's body in a direct and gentle way. Find it used on abebooks.com (no shipping costs!) by clicking here or on amazon.com by clicking here.)
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