On Being the Older Woman

Ten years ago, when my family first started attending Valley Bible Church, I was in awe of the women I met there. It seemed like every woman I talked to was welcoming, beautiful, joyful, kind, and gracious. Some were homeschooling moms with four or more children. Some were grandmothers. But no matter what stage of life they were in, these women were strong yet humble leaders in the church, working together to serve the youth, missions, children's ministry, and events. I didn't sense that there was a pecking order; the church did not feel like a social club. (Isn't it sad that I even had to write that, because there are churches out there like that?)

At the time, I had just turned thirty, and was still trying to figure out life with three children, ages five and under. I struggled with my sense of self and with my security in God's peace and love. And after six years of serving in a church plant with mostly other twenty-somethings, I was hungry for wisdom from older women. 

These women have not let me down–they are the real deal–and they have been my role models for the past ten years (whether they knew it or not). Through conversations, Bible studies, and serving alongside the older women, I have grown immensely. They have taught me about true beauty, one that flows out from the Spirit living inside. They have taught me about interdependence and living in community. They have taught me about being a good wife and mother and what it means to be a daughter of God.

I realized recently, when I turned forty, that I am now the "older" woman that the younger women in my church might look up to. I pray I am just as gracious, kind, joyful, and humble as my role models. And this year, I will be speaking three times at my church, on three different subjects. Marriage, parenting, and hospitality are all things that I had been studying these past ten years and have become passionate about. Never would I have imagined that I would be ask to speak on them! I am looking forward to sharing what I know, and I hope to do a good job! 

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior… They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women…  ~Titus 2:3-4