A New Perspective

I had received a set of chalk markers for Christmas, and I was up to no good.

My plan was to use the markers to draw a circle on the bathroom mirror, then write "THE BEST" above the circle, and finally, add several arrows pointing from the words to the circle. The only problem was the circle needed to be at the height of my husband's head, so that when he brushed his teeth that night, he would see his face in a bright halo of arrows.

I grabbed a short stool, one that would make me just about my husband's height, then set it in the bathroom. I was amazed when I stood on it! I never would have thought that five inches could make such a difference. The sink seemed so far away! The top of the door frame was so close! I could see the top of the towel rack, not just the towel! And the low shower nozzle, which is a perfect height for me, must be so frustrating for him!

For the first time, I was seeing the world as my husband saw it. And for the first time, I had a true understanding of how different our perspectives could be! And just think, if a few inches could make such a big difference, then our backgrounds, educations, genders, and personalities could make an even bigger difference.

At that moment, my appreciation for my husband went way up, because, despite our differences, I don't often feel like my husband and I are at odds. We are two minds that strive to be in unity and we see "eye to eye" more often than not. This isn't always easy (because our tendency is to assume that other people see things the same way as we see them) but my husband tries to communicate his thoughts and feelings as clearly as he can, and encourages me to do the same. We must make a practice of continually learning about the other person (more on that in the next post!)

And I thank God that despite our differences, my husband and I hold on to the same goals and values. We are bound by the love of God, which is greater than any differences we have.

Last weekend, we took the family on a day trip to the Chico area. As we drove home, my husband pointed to the setting sun reflecting in the glassy smooth surfaces of the ponds. "Wow!" we said. And even if I couldn't know for sure that my husband saw the same oranges and reds I saw, I knew that his heart and mine were in unity.

This is a picture of what I want for my marriage… today and everyday.

(Tip: Chalk markers are great for leaving love notes on mirrors to your spouse!)