Niche-Finding

Etsy, Facebook, Instagram, Kickstarter... with the Internet and smart phones, there are now more groups out there than I can count! And while my artsy friends, crafty friends, savvy friends, and musical friends are announcing their talents to the world, I feel out of the loop. I had a short-lived account on Linked-in (but it was pointless, because I don't need business connections), and then so-and-so asked me to join Twitter (which I still don't understand), and for a while, I did play around with the idea of selling things on Etsy (but really, do I have the time?) I see on Facebook how old friends have gone on to become models, opera singers, pilots, photographers... and me? What am I doing? Where's MY niche?!

Back in my college days, I thought classical music was my niche. I loved singing and playing the piano, but I found that I was not content singing only opera, or playing only Beethoven. I tried to branch out into jazz, I started writing my own songs, I even wanted to write film music.

(side story: One day, I saw a spread in a music magazine showing the top twenty film composers gathered in one room, and there was not one woman in that photo. I told my friend that I wanted to be the first woman to be a part of that group. You know how the story ends.)

My performance friends told me to pursue performance, my musicology friends told me to pursue musicology, but they didn't know me well enough. By graduation day, I found little motivation to chase after these goals and titles. Neither did I want to work at the outdoor school that had offered me a job, or teach piano full-time, or accompany choirs in the city.

I wanted to be a wife, a mother, a homemaker. I worked after graduating, but I no longer pursued like I used to. I still wanted to belong somewhere, but I knew I had to wait and be content with where God had me for the moment.

Soon after, I became a teacher, started leading worship at church, rediscovered the crafts of collaging and crocheting, played at a few weddings, but still, none of those were my niche. Then I met my husband (have I ever shared that story with you?) and became a wife and mother. But still, still, I hadn't found my niche, at least not yet, because diapers and dishes are definitely NOT my niche, and because God made me a multi-faceted woman with creativity to share.

It is only now, after ten years of motherhood, eleven-and-one-fourth years of marriage, and countless trials (in the sense of trying, not suffering) that I can say I have found my niche! (Hal-le-lu-jah! ) For my love of choral music, I have my little church children's choir. We may never get pass one-part singing, but I love it! For teaching, I have of course my five pupils at home. A few select friends receive a hand-made card or crocheted baby hat to celebrate them. And though no one will hear my songs outside of various living rooms, I can play classical, jazzy, folksy, whatever I please. And this year, my husband and I have started counseling engaged couples!

Sometimes I wonder if I would like to start a bakery like Ana in Stranger Than Fiction. Or maybe someday I'll volunteer at the local library and work to develop a program that brings seniors and young people together. Or maybe I'll go back to school and get my masters' degree in choral conducting. Who knows?!

I don't need to part of a group to find my niche, because my niche is truly mine and mine alone. It has no name and it is not publicized or well-known. It will be ever-changing, as God is ever changing me.